A peek into my scintillating and incredibly glamorous life, as gleaned from scratched notes on a pad throughout the day. Enjoy (if you make it all the way through without falling asleep!)
Check my work (the one that pays) email. Meh... nothing remotely motivating. Reply to some new inquiries that will never go anywhere. Stomach grumbles. Realize I didn't eat breakfast. Run downstairs to grab a bowl of Fiber One cereal (you know, the stuff that isn't supposed to taste like cardboard, but kinda does.) My daughter, Daisy, and mother are at the bottom of the stairs. Listen to mum regale stores of how Daisy was blowing snot bubbles during breakfast. (Momentarily reconsider that bowl of cereal). Stand in front of the tv rapidly shoveling in my cereal and watching an interview with Paul Giammati about his new movie. "Barney's Version." Realize I will probably never get to the theater to see it. Mentally tune out and listen to my mother trying to teach my daughter correct pronouns (she still talks about herself in the 3rd person.) "When Daisy talks about herself she says 'me'. You say 'me', not Daisy." Think that it's likely that Daisy will be 21 before she gets that one. (No offense, mum, I'm not doing any better!)
9:00 am - check my calendar for the day. Bliss! No conference calls or webinars. Feeling of excitement lasts only a minute after I remember I have a list of to-dos that are less than exciting, including follow-up calls to people who never return them. Try to check my personal email but the site is down. Momentarily irritated before realizing I'm not supposed to be in personal email anyway. Decide to have a quick (as in jump-in-soap-jump-out) shower first, in the hopes it will boost my enthusiasm for the day. Realize fleetingly that my throat STILL HURTS after what seems like months of being sick. In a matter of seconds, debate and dismiss need to go to doctor. Don't want more antibiotics.
10:00 am - While writing away on a promotional piece, am continuously distracted by my mother losing temper with Daisy's Thomas the Tank Engine Mega Blocks play set, which my daughter repeatedly dismantles throughout the course of the day in toddler-temper (and which nobody can seem to fix except for her Dad.) Train set is called "Stupid!" (use English accent - "stewpid" - and through mother's gritted teeth) at least ten times. Then, as my mother frantically tries to put the train set back together, Daisy begins to whine "Pleaeaaaase muuuuuuum! Mummy help you! Mummy help you!" which does not go down well. (And further illustrates the problem with the pronouns, since she means "Mummy help me!") Husband attempts to promote my photography Facebook fanpage. All goes terribly wrong. Redeems himself quickly.
English elevenses - cup of tea and a home made fiber muffin (Yes, MORE fiber. Let's not go there.) Realize that, despite having run and emptied the dish washer just yesterday afternoon, we are already out clean tea spoons. How does this happen? Back to writing... Have an idea for an article for a real estate e-zine and so dash off a quick synopsis email to the editor. Smell of orange Pledge I used to polish my desk yesterday is giving me a headache and so light my tangerine candle. Citrus overload.
12:00 pm - My mother left the dogs outside while she went out for a walk and my eldest dog, Frankie, has not stopped barking for... forever. They should use him in Afghanistan instead of water-boarding. Much more effective. On the other hand, it's payback for the neighbors. If they are home. (Fingers crossed.) Am I wicked? Talking of wicked, Amazon.com keeps sending me Daily Deals Alerts. I need to unsubscribe. Unless it's free right now, I aint buying. (Hello post-Christmas-poverty!) Had someone recommend a blog about "The Happiness Project". Is someone trying to tell me I'm a miserable shrew?
1:00 pm - While simultaneously writing a puff piece about the products I sell, I told my husband (as feedback to one of his marketing pieces) that no fancy marketing words could replace sending a prospect "something of value". Stopped writing puff pieces. Changed tactics. Duh. One thing I do love about my job: I can do that. Switcheroo, just like that. Of course, I just negated almost a whole morning's work. Sigh.
2:00 pm - Listening to my mother try to put my daughter down for her nap without the binky. Daisy used to fall asleep in Nanny's arms when we had the b-thing but now she kicks and screams and fights and is not so cooperative. Of course, mother won't let her cry for a second. No sireee. So she reads her 6 books and shhhhes in her ear like a steam train. Sigh. Grandparents! Got requested contract revisions from a new potential client. Sigh, again. (Lots of sighing goes on during my day.)
3:00 pm - Got an email about "What your toddler should be drinking". Had a moment of "OMG, I bet Daisy isn't drinking as much as she needs and is probably drinking too much juice!" and then paused with hand on mouse and, instead, deleted the email. In fact, I unsubscribed to the emails forever. So tired of hearing what my daughter should or shouldn't be doing. She (and I) are just fine. GO AWAY! On subject of drinking, randomly realize I have not had a martini in... months? A friend recommends I start drinking right away, and keep it up, for fear of developing an intolerance. Ack. An intolerance to martinis!? "BARTENDER!"
4:00 pm - Finishing up work and trying to tell a client-to-be that the whole purpose of a 12 month contract is that they commit to 12 months. Because, you know, if you have the option to cancel with barely notice at any time, then it's not really a 12 month contract. Ahem.
5:00 pm - Linoleum shopping with the hubs and Daisy at Home Depot. For my birthday we're re-doing the laundry room. (I know, it's like getting a toaster for your anniversary but it's what I wanted so, whatevs.) I want black-and-white tile-type linoleum to replace the original flooring that is 70s and just plain icky. See below. Apparently black-and-white linoleum is next-to-impossible to come by but we found what we need for $45 in the remnants section. Woot! The walls will be hot, hot orange, btw. It's gonna be RAD. As to whether it will actually result in me being any more timely with pushing laundry through? That's going to remain up for debate.
6:00 pm - Stop for a hot-dog at Urban Dog & Sausage. Ughh... no day ever seems right to start my diet. Ok, really, I know: every day is right. But it's a sausage! So, tomorrow then?