If you're friends with me on Facebook, you've no doubt been witness to my recent exultations about my newest twitter followers, @ErnestoRiley and @_erinheatherton. The first is a pseudonym for Matt Davis, who plays Alaric Salzman on The Vampire Diaries. The second is an actress and Victoria's Secret model, who presumably found me via Ernesto. (Find me at @MsRantyPants)
Despite being 35 and seriously too old for such things, I am unabashed to admit that I am quite giddy about being followed by two celebs. I mean, putting this in context: I'm a suburban working mom living in (groan) Sacraghetto; this is about as exciting as it gets these days. Long gone are my semi-glamorous stints on teen celebrity magazines in London and Los Angeles or managing special events in the OC. I'm all growed-up and responsible now, folks. (Gag.)
But yet, here I am with a direct line into the world of teen tv shows (and a VAMPIRE show at that!) via my twitter feed. Now, when I write something they SEE IT. That's right. People who are people (or vampires) and who know other people who are people (and maybe also vampires), are reading my daily drivel. It's just a little intoxicating. And paralyzing. I mean, surely they will eventually realize that my life is about as interesting and compelling as watching a dog shit in the park, and they will promptly unfollow me or, worse still, block me entirely, thus cutting me off from future notoriety in celeb circles. How does Hubby and me singing and dancing in the aisle of Trader Joe's to starve-off a toddler tantrum, compete with sucking fake blood out of a super hot dude or chick? I mean, it just doesn't.
Of course, my giddiness is completely nerdworthy. Deep down, like all 35-going-on-14 year olds, I harbor some thoroughly ridiculous notion that my tweets will be sooooooooo witty that they will connect me with talent agents in Hollywood who will make me famous. God knows exactly what for because I've turned out to be a jack of all trades and master of none in this life but, you know, this is my fantasy notion, I get to skim over the inconvenient details. And, it is without a doubt that, in this dream reality of mine, I will hob-nob with hot men who play vampires (I'm following @iansomerholder but I'm guessing he's busy because he hasn't joined the *rush* to follow me yet) and hide my face from TMZ as I duck out of some unmarked private club at 3am.
Ahem. Yes, Quite.
Alright, we all know I go to bed at 10pm. Like I said: inconvenient truths.
Undoubtedly, it is likely that Matt and Erin will read this blog (because I post links on twitter) and block me by morning.
In other news...
I have been finding a lot of other really cool mommies-who-blog-and-take-great-photos blogs. Apparently I am neither unique or trailblazing (there goes those twitter followers for sure this time). It seems there are almost literally millions of talented mommy writers and photographers who, through the powers of Social Networking, have become quite infamous in their own right. And yes, I'm sure late to the party on this one too.
As I find these cool sites, I'm adding them to my blogroll on the right but I will endeavor to talk about one or two of them on an occasional basis here. I like finding other great blogs through existing blogs I like and maybe you will too.
One of the new blogs I found is Dude and Sweetie. Jess, the writer of D&S, started following me on twitter too after I followed her (as you do... everyone who blogs Facebooks and tweets) and commented on one of my tweets about my burgeoning waistline. (Oh, there, that's it. Supermodel unfollowed me for sure.) Aaaanyway, she said she needed to lose some pounds also and so we sparred back and forth re: a possible competition, held accountable by our respective blogs, to lose 15lbs. We got stuck on the "stakes" and now she is sick and probably eating mashed potato with lots of butter to drown her sorrows, so we're on hold right now. Or maybe she wasn't serious? Hmmm... well.... anyway, I was. I love a little competition. So, if you do have any ideas about the stakes for winner or loser, please comment. Fun and funny and motivating would be my criteria.
Jess did suggest bare-ass photos on our blogs but, I think, maybe not. One of these days I may take my suburban mom status to the next level and join the PTA or something and I can just see some snotty-nosed soccer mom parading those photos around at a PTA meeting, to get me voted off. Plus, if Matt and Erin are still with me (and GOD FORBID Ian has become a fan too) that will definitely be the nail in my twitter coffin.
9 comments:
OMG girl you crack me up!
I'm laughing like crazy...or maybe its just the wine...lol!
Well if the loser has to post bare ass photos, that's a heck of an incentive to win.
How about you both go on a photographic weekend somewhere, and the first to hit 15lbs gets her trip paid for by the other?
@e - she has 3 kids. I think we'd like to lose the weight sooner rather than later. LOL.
Thank you! A little laughter before bed is a wonderful thing! LOL!
Okay, so I just read this post, and I'm drinking my last Coke Zero of the day and totally spurted, because I'd forgotten the bare-assed photos comment.
I didn't forget actually. I'm not eating mashed potatoes, but I have had way too much soup and smoothes, as my ear is so heinously infected I can't close my jaw, therefore rendering me unable to chew.
So. You, me, and 15lbs. And...stakes. So I'm thinking that a total grunge, non-makeup bad hair photo posted on our blog is a good incentive. I mean, I don't do the mail without my hair at least up and decent.
Whatcha think?
@Jess - I love it. I hardly ever posts photos of me because I usually look hellish unless I have a ton of make-up on.
And maybe we enlist our husbands and make them snap us unexpectedly, so it's not a "fake" bad photo?
How long do we have to lose this blubber? 1-2lbs a week is considered safe, which would put us at about the end of the year. OR, is it the first person to get to 15?
First-do you have a scale? Cuz in order for us to be all honest and stuff, we need to take a pic of ourselves standing on the scale.
So I say we do that tomorrow or Monday. We give ourselves until the end of October, which makes it a healthy rate of loss. On November 1, we take another pic of ourselves on the scale, and then post them to our blog to we can determine who is the winner.
Person closest to 15 pounds wins. Unless we lose more. Basically, most loss wins. Then we let the ugly photo commence.
Sound good? Email me and we can further discuss if needed.
@Jess - emailed you. Let the shame commence!
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